Sunday, August 14, 2005

just like high school

opening weekend has been a ball. i had so much adrenaline from our first show that i ended up going out after the post-show reception to hear one of my favorite local band's perform at their CD release party. last night after the show, i went out with several cast members to the hukilau for drinks and kicks. then today, we went on a pub crawl in the castro. one of my fellow cast members brian and i got a bite to eat at a japanese restaurant ( i tried sushi for the first time, and it confirmed what i believed all along) and then met up with everyone at the bar next door. after a good 30 minutes there we walked down a block to another bar that has a dance floor and danced for a long while. it was great to release all the energy that had been building throughout the performance. some thugalicious guy asked if he could dance with me, and he looked like he was 12 and 4'10... which was all kind of odd to me, until the bartender came on the dancefloor and hauled him out the door.

i was never a partier in high school. i still don't fancy the bar scene that much and get to a point of no return where i am so over it. but i enjoyed being with my castmates in a setting that they dug. it's been an amazing show, and there have been all these great conversations/God indwellings happening. but like high school, you sometimes feel like a total arse, and sometimes develop crushes where you shouldn't.
but sometimes there are these gossamer moments where all is right with the world, even as the energy flows through you and lets you know you will not be going to sleep at a "decent hour tonight" and that's okay. i have been meditating on the psalms lately which have been a great source of restfulness, even when my body is feeling overexerted. i'm feeling really restless as the end draws near. restless about how it all will shake out. but wasn't it kind of like that at graduation- it's kind of just like the end of high school, really. maybe that means i will actually grow up.


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