Tuesday, August 30, 2005

a detour into the ER

last night, instead of our bible study group meeting, i encountered my friend, the leader of said study, cindy, bleeding profusely from her right index finger. she had been cutting lemons with a very sharp blade. my RA instinct came out and i had her elevate the finger after i wrapped it with a makeshift splint for 15 minutes, determined that if after 15 minutes it was still bleeding, we would go to the ER.

15 minutes later she pulled on a jacket and we hopped in my car, bound to get her still bleeding finger surveyed and stitched up. what is it about the ER that brings the "crazy" out of people? there i was with a fun sticker that labeled me as "ER visitor"- we wondered if this was in case security thought i might camp out for a while just to people watch, though i had forgotten to pack a sleeping bag or canteen... to our left this teenager was slumped at what looked to be a very uncomfortable angle bellowing out every several minutes about how much "fucking" pain he was in. which surprisingly aroused a fit of giggles in me, masqueraded by a catalog concealing my face. later on, he proceeded to pace and talk loudly. then at one point he went back to the receptionist seated behind the plexiglass and yelled how he'd been there three hours, when was someone going to see him (fist hits plexiglass).

i'm starting to think things might get going and began salivating, considering poor cindy and i were resigned to reading time magazine from 2002 or re-reading my paper source catalog. but sadly, the security officer feigned authority and asked the kid to sit, which he obligingly did...wimp.

when we finally got called into one of the back rooms, they led us to the kiddie room, with drawers labeled "children's diversions" (aka "toys") and a freakish painting of a broken crayon and coloring book in a rain puddle... odd choice of art. when the dr. came in, it was the guy i had dubbed "dr. hot stuff." by now i was punchy and had begun to read restaurant reviews in accents and start drafting stories of the physicians on duty's lives.

$100 later, they super-glued cindy's finger back together. yowza, i can't imagine pouring glue into an open "laceration." we were convinced that the $100 bought better vocabulary, evidenced in "diversions" (toys) and "laceration" (cut). but i guess it also bought a very entertaining night because who goes to the ER on a tuesday night, really, they don't have enticements like happy hours. but they do have crazies. oh, yes, the crazies congregate at the ER.


Blogger Kelly G said...

love reading your blog!

9:32 PM  
Blogger Bethany said...

Oh my...what a night! Glad you kept you sense of humor...what is life without a little giggling at the craziness around us?

Hope your friend's finger heals up nicely!

1:19 PM  
Blogger Faith said...

That's why those hospital t.v. shows are so great...true to life!!!

10:35 PM  

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