Saturday, October 09, 2004

a hebrews moment

last night my friend stacey turned 30.

she has been this voice of wisdom and reason in my life- someone God has had accompany me through thick and thin. i value and appreciate her life, her boisterous laugh and her penchant to put colors and outfits together. i chose to skip soccer to be able to be fully at her party without being pulled away to something else.

i love parties- especially the kind where you can hob nob with old friends. fabulous really. they're a virtual reunion at times with old grad school friends whose lives have become as full and at times frenetic as my own. barb and jason, watson, karen and michael, among many others were there. all people who have spoken into my life and made it so much more beautiful and understandable. i love them all. and i especially love that we can enter into deep, meaningful dialogue pretty easily, avoiding chit-chat, much like skimming the foam off of a latte.

at one point stacey petitioned all the musicians who had brought their instruments to bring them in the big room. elijah stepped behind his keyboard; pablo strapped on his guitar; brian propped his djembe in the cradle between his two knees and music ensued. worship songs that are rich and smoky. as odd as this may sound, sometimes when i'm singing with my eyes closed, i see certain colors visualized in my mind's eye. this warm luscious burgundy color enveloped my mind, my voice, the room as i heard people singing from deep within themselves. i could pick out barb's sweet soprano from larissa's energetic mezzo voice. with eyes closed i could hear when watson was being silent and when he interjected his tremulous voice among the others. i could hear their voices and so badly wanted mine to dance around theirs- augmenting them and reaching the ecstatic place of harmony and melody in balance with one another, in tandem.

i envisioned these songs, these notes of warmth and high pitches raising before God in the curly wisps of smoke, a pleasing incense offered to our God, from grateful, ever so grateful hearts. at moments like these i am aware that this is what i am made for. what we all are made for. the din of everyday life is hushed and the only thing that matters is God and me trying to letting know i am His and i am grateful, so grateful... for something i never could have achieved on my own. that cost Him so much. so much so, that i will never be able to grasp it, even when i am old, grey and have the twinges of wisdom brought on by a long, full life.

we were singing "blessed be the name" and as i could hear these particular people's voices that i dearly loved, the thought struck me, "this is my cloud of witnesses." hebrews 12:1 says "therefore since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down..." these are some of the people when i am suffering or prospering i want to remember and be remembered by, who will hold me accountable and love, challenge and encourage me.

the singing was so vibrant that several whoops ejaculated from different people's mouths around the room during one song. we all wanted to be in that moment and take advantage of it.
as quickly as it started, it ended. the music died down, we prayed prayers of blessing over stacey and afterwards milled about, while some left for home.

when it was time for me to leave, i breathed deeply and it smelled like red wine and chocolate, like love and sacrifice all intermingled into this fragrant aroma requiring each person- each ingredient all the ingredients to be present, each bringing its own unique flavor to the mix. each adored by God. each adoring God in the mundane and majestic moments of life. a good hebrews moment realized.

"Without wavering, let us hold tightly to the hope we have, for God can be trusted to keep his promise. Think of ways to encourage one another to outbursts of love and good deeds. And let us not neglect meeting together, as some people do, but encourage and warn each other, especially now that the day of his coming back again is drawing near." ~Hebrews 10:23-26


Blogger Russ said...

nice being somewhere i wasn't. thanks for sharing the story....

10:42 PM  

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