regression into junior high

i saw tears for fears perform today. i was as close as anyone could have been, my body almost up against the security grate. from where i stood i could see roland orzabal so clearly, that when he made the weird lipped expressions when playing guitar alone (as my friend kenny tells me all good guitarists usually are able to sing the lines being played on the guitar) i could see them distinctly. earlier in the concert, dashboard confessionals' chris carabba heard girls scream:

"i love you!"
"oh my gosh, i'm going to cry."
"you're so hot!"

i was nothing like those girls, but maybe mine was just a more grown-up form of fandom. i took 18 photos of him and of curt smith. i think a few of them will turn out to be smashing. they were still so fresh in their vocal abilities and gave a great show. i particularly loved their british bantering like when they made a comment about "how everybody loves a happy ending (title of new CD), but then how can they explain the success of Shakepeare's tragedies?" silence from the audience. a few of us guffawed.

he's gotten so much older. i am so much older. i used to have a mad crush on him in junior high and high school. i loved his voice, and also how his face sang along too, not just his mouth taking the lead. today as i watched him i kept wondering what it was like to sing these songs made popular over a decade ago, only to unearth them and see/hear the audience sing each lyric. what different people all of us are. today i retained the sense of my crush for the duration of the set, but left it at the front of the stage, as i walked back to meet up with my friend and leave the concert. junior high girl neatly packed back up into my backpack. but i'm still looking forward to developing those 18 photos.