i am

i am grumpy if i've only had seven hours of sleep, when i should have had eight
i am a user of unsavory words in german- even though i know the meaning doesn't change
i am far too easily swayed by sugar even when i can hear my body protest
i am not reckless behind the wheel, just having bad car-ma this year or so i tell myself
i am always at war with keeping my desk orderly, though it often wins
i am intense and focused, when i should sometimes let things just happen
i am not rash in life, rather risky and exercising carpe diem in a dead poets way
i am a lover of live music where i can dance along and tap my leg
i am too direct and alienate people when at times i should be more sensitive
i am in need of tidying people's plates & silverware when they have finished eating
i am far too self-interested; my inner monologue should worm its way outside of self
i am a control freak if i deem incapable, when i should just be chill
i am trusting of few people, when some of my closest friends trust everyone they meet
i am a clotheshorse/ lover of color, though at times i should curb my enthusiasm
i am quiet when contemplating/dissecting things, though it's often misperceived
i am a liar, but mostly to myself
i am a poet, chanteuse, friend, boss, when at times i wish i could just be az
i am part mrs. bennett when i'd rather be totally lizzie
i am a closet romantic who would rather be known as the cynic seeing as it's safer
i am aware of numerous shortcomings even when fully aware of great strengths
i am justly accused yet mercifully forgiven
i am either late or early, but rarely on time
i am a bad chooser when rushed, though i would rather be wise always
i am attempting to live a devoted life amid drama, changes & airplane connections
i am a fan of silence and noise in balanced doses
i am sometimes right & stubborn as heck when other people can't recognize it
i am sometimes so sure the glass is half full, when i discover it's half empty
i am my own worst critic even as i extend more grace to those around me

i am, in spite of myself, loved by i am

just as i am